Thursday 31 January 2013

Can you tell what it is yet?

 Little t has developed a taste for painting objects other than himself and is currently turning out works of art.
Mr Frosty isn't talking to us as he was taken to the V E T where he was topped and tailed, that is his horns were debudded and his family jewels errrr debudded. He is uttering a mew every now and then several octaves higher than before. He now has options, Mr Whirlpool or pet, its down to him and how fast he learns not to pee on everything that moves, doesn't move or hasn't been peed on already.

Wednesday 30 January 2013

Post haste

 Things didn't go quite as planned today (for a change) (mind you the week off work isn't going as planned either) in the few hours I wasn't at work. Signs were ominous when the farm supply bods only had 10 wooden rails when yours truly wanted closer to 100. So thoughts of extending the fenced off areas at HQ fell at the first hurdle so instead I embarked on a few hours clear up shifting the old fence posts down the bonsai mountain. Thanks to impeccable timing (aka luck) I picked the two hours of clear sky and sunshine to run (ahem) up and down the slippery slope to retrieve some of the 200 old fence posts dumped at various points on our plot of green.
 Its taking some getting used to, gates that work, hang straight and keep animals the right side of them
and the Berners are having trouble getting used to finding dog proof barriers where they were used to holes.
Eva produced a new trick to get out being milked tonight, the dogs get all the milk at the moment as its a bit unhygienic nay unpalatable after she has put at least one hoof in the bucket, farted over it, sat in it, forward rolled to get away and tonight she reached underneath her and began to drink the milk in the bucket. Perseverance is the key, one of us will give up one day.

Tuesday 29 January 2013

Dust Magnets

Not that we have a mantle piece any more but when we did the most expensive thing you might find trapping dust would be half a melted candle, or the contents of my pocket, change left from lunch.  On a visit today I saw this work of art carved from a 1000 year old piece of oak from a local castle, its one solid piece and the figures range from John the Baptist, the Queen, Posh and Becks, a Chav and the artist who made the piece who I think was called Parsons. Nice as it was it wouldn't last at HQ, not as it is, a few tooth marks would be bound to appear. I'm hoping to take some time off work tomorrow to do a bit of woodworking myself but I got a feeling its not going to be quite so intricate as this wooden wonder.

Monday 28 January 2013

Cartoon dog strikes again

Missy learning how to sit on the sofa. Its not going well.

Sunday 27 January 2013

We're sinking

 Living on he slopes of the Bonsai Mountain you would think flooding would not be a concern but the sheer volume of water pouring from the sky and off the hill has led to several problems that needed solving today. The workshop flooded, Spotty alerted us to this by carrying his bed into the kitchen, there was nothing we could do about that water, the roof is the problem and given my capacity for falling from heights crawling over the annex roof is banned. Probably just as well as had I self harmed I would not have been around to launch the lifeboat.
The weather gave us four seasons in one hour, sunshine when the horses take away was delivered, then torrential rain, hail, snow and gale force winds sent us diving for cover (coffee and cake) until the squall passed and we could stow away the logs. As the naughty ponies had wrecked a bale of hay stored for bedding I took the chance that the sun would still shine while I carried fresh bedding to the soggy. Pam and her piglets were fine, Bridget and her brood were treading water and firing emergency flares. No choice but to launch the life boat and rescue the wet porkers who gratefully followed the blue bucket of allure to the relative safety of the small pig pen. Back on dry land their attention turned to more important matters like food and that gave yours truly and the fencing Jedi the time to cobble up a sort of fence, as in it sort of looks like a fence if you squint from 100 yards away. As the Jedi master said, its not a show fence, its a work in progress. Hopefully the work in progress will keep the pork confused/contained until Wednesday when three more go to pig sty's new, and next Sunday when two more give their total commitment to bacon and sausage.

Hide and seek!

 Now you see me!
Now you don't!

Saturday 26 January 2013

Going green

 It rained most of the night and the mornings clear sky allowed the sun to carry on where the rain left off. Mind you it didn't leave off for long and as I type its raining cats and dogs by the bucket full so most of the white stuff has departed and throughout the day a few double take shave occurred when a huge patch of green catches you by surprise.
 The Cauldron is turning back into a swamp and the rest of the smallholding is turning back into the Somme like quagmire we are used to. The winter wonderland was nice while it lasted.
 The Berners made the most of it this morning.
 Talking of double takes my eyes could not believe what they were seeing at 5pm when on the evening feed round, two very large cheeky adult foxes trotting along the other side of the fence to me and Spotty. Quite a surprise.
If I remember in time tomorrow and if they are creatures of habit they might get a surprise of their own. This does rely on me remembering where the keys are to release Mr Beretta, and it not raining.

Buddy Banzai!

A good effort, a snow Banzai from Buddy

Friday 25 January 2013

Thaw look at that

 The forecast is for the snow to depart over the next 24 hours, or for there to be another dump of 8 inches, which would most likely explain why its currently hailing.
 The critters are getting a tad fed up of the white stuff, I'm fed up of the potential disaster every time I put a foot down. This morning the sheep were all hiding in with Apollo, he didn't mind sharing floor space but got the hump when they ate his breakfast.


Thursday 24 January 2013

Five a day

 Early doors gave me just enough time to take a few snaps of the picturesque iciness just in case I didn't get back in daylight. 
 The icicles are growing, as is the pile of pooh outside the stable because trying to wheelbarrow it on the downhill luge is an extreme sport that I have yet to master.
 Inquiries as to the well being of Mr Frosty have come in thick and fast, so thanks for asking, and here is an update. He's doing fine, I on the other hand have to run the gauntlet of milking his bonkers mother everyday, so one of us is growing well, enjoying central heating and interesting playmates while the other is nursing bruises and changing out of milk sodden clothing.
 Little t thinks Mr Frosty is ace
 while Holly is not so sure.
 Back to healthy eating
 the joy of carrot and cheese, or as we would call them melon and pineapple, well he got the colours right.
Learning to drive is a bit trickier than identifying food groups but he's having a go.

Wednesday 23 January 2013

More of the same

 The rock at the back of HQ viewed from little t's bedroom covered in the white stuff
looks a bit different but still as big!

Tuesday 22 January 2013

Watch this space!

 Something very exciting is happening to this building, it should have happened already but the small gods of weather disruption are having their fun and games at the moment so its been delayed a few days, so watch this space!


So as the weather keeps us entertained the critters are doing there best to keep us occupied. Barely had the words "Shes doing really well, what a good girl" by my beautiful and oh so patient wife been uttered when Eva, the agoraphobic goat, who was being milked by yours truly to get life saving sustenance for Mr Frosty (who else) the enormous billy kid that is currently snoozing in front of the rayburn, hoofed the container of milk over my left leg. Undeterred I began milking again and just about replaced what I was crying over when what sounded like a bomb going off made my reflexes tried and propel me away from the danger while my brain was screaming its only a goat fart, my nose in the emissions area urged evasive action and the resulting confused neural messages prompted enough action to tip the second attempt to get Mr Frosty's breakfast over my right leg.

Monday 21 January 2013

Even the greatest start small

 Ahhh...The great outdoors...
 even the longest journey starts with the smallest of steps.....a journey of exploration...
 where strange creatures are seen....
 ..water hazards crossed....
 ..giant dogs avoided...
 ..some will try and deter you, make you doubt your goal...
 .....in the end trust your judgement.....
 ..until Grandma tells you that's far enough, its time to go home.....

..Hurrumph! Bet this never happened to Ranulph!

Sunday 20 January 2013

Surprise surprise!

Bit of a shock this morning in the med bay where Eva has taken up residence, she hadn't moved from yesterdays bed and now there was a minime Boris on the floor.
The poor lad really chose his moment to arrive, on the coldest day so far
and in a bit of a state when we found him. The fight to keep him this side of the light is on. 

Meanwhile others are still enjoying the new play stuff
lots to see and do
and Laurel and Hardy made their own bird table scoffing the cats food. By the way anyone who watches "In the night garden", well the inventor of the Pinky Ponk (google it) must have kept peacocks, they sound so similar, especially on take off.
Back on the range Frosty is clinging on to life but he doesn't look too interested in staying.

Saturday 19 January 2013

Deep and crisp and even

 The white stuff stayed put, no new stuff, but plenty to be going on with making life interesting for the critters of all shapes and sizes. The Bantams stayed put
 while Laurel or Hardy were sitting pretty.
 Chester, having a nice warm stable to sleep in on a bed of luxurious straw took a nap outside
 while Wooly (I think) made her own bed, ignoring Chesters unbolted stable door.
 Some had nice comfy beds to lie on as they are ill equipped to cope with weather, or too old to cope,
 while others were built for survival.
And others got taken for a very long walk in the dark snowy hills just for fun. Well it would be a shame to waste it.