While yours truly took ten minutes from parenting the apprentice to make a well earned brew
Thursday, 30 October 2014
Wednesday, 29 October 2014
Posted by Tony at 21:49
Tuesday, 28 October 2014
Posted by Tony at 23:09
Monday, 27 October 2014
So it came as no surprise that today whilst I was enjoying the real alternative to work, meetings, I had seventeen missed calls from a frantic delivery driver in an articulated lorry stuck in the lane. Suffice to say despite phoning Steve to enquire what he had written in crayola on the sales docket and confirming it said small lorry, the sofa has not arrived and we await further developments.
Posted by Tony at 23:04
Sunday, 26 October 2014
Posted by Tony at 21:34
Saturday, 25 October 2014
While in yours truly's stall things look like a cross between a stable and junkyard with the multi torture kit assembled but as there were no instructions I have no idea how the various pulleys, wires and chains all link together to make it more useful than a seat.
Posted by Tony at 22:17
Friday, 24 October 2014
Since the last epic challenge (167 miles in 13 hours including stops) when all feeling was lost in a very important place just in front of the saddle, less cycling has been managed due to some intense pain when turning the pedals in the family department. Medics have almost decided that I am not a malingerer (scans, blood tests etc all clear) but unless a kidney stone has lodged somewhere low down and so far unseen then the root cause has to be lifestyle which boils down to cycling. Doc asked if I would consider giving up, but as it combines several of my favourite things like personal challenge, physical exercise and bacon sarnies he was on a losing wicket. Would I consider cutting down, well I have, but as I am planning to increase to a 480 mile man test with 28 miles of mountain running all in 72 hours next June to raise money for Myeloma UK, then no chance.
Hence rethink on apparatus of bike, a new saddle for a start. Super salesman, a not Steve, a Clive, leads me through the serried ranks of gleaming carbon racing steeds to a back room where I am fitted for a saddle.
This involved sitting on a gel pad for 20 seconds leaving an impression that is measured by a lazer and from that my ideal saddle was computed. While we waited he pointed out that my lovely stock racer is a medium frame which suits my dwarf like inside leg, but the length of the frame did not suit my longer than a dwarfs back while my wide chest was totally unsuited to the narrow 42 bars that come as standard. Couple that with my inability to straighten my left arm so lack of reach, compared to my right, then my left shoulder higher than my right due to two collar bone breaks, it was he gravely pointed out, not a surprise that I, in his view, was probably unable to pee straight after a bike ride. The computer suggested a type of saddle, he found it, it had a sort of strange tilt bit at the back to straighten my hips, but refused to sell it until I brought my bike in, and cycling gear, so they could strap me to a test rig to make sure it was indeed the right one. So one day next week I am going to be wired into the matrix and videoed, analysed and my riding style pulled apart so they can fit me with a new perch. Its suddenly got very serious this cycling gig.
Posted by Tony at 23:30
Thursday, 23 October 2014
"You need to get your project approved by the ethics committee, they sit again in November can you make a presentation to that one"
"Good, remember this is an exercise in research, you don't have to change the world."
"Did you get the email about attendance"
"Your attendance falls way behind what's expected"
Y"es you have to log on to the university hub to register the fact that you are working, its monitored, you have not been logging on."
"Oh. But I don't need to."
Well I logged on, downloaded the course, printed it off and I'm working through it....I did the same last year."
(Silence) "So you have all the course material.?"
"Yes...I can then read it whenever I want."
"And you don't need to log on to read it?"
"No, its here in front of me in a file"
(Silence) "Thats brilliant, wait til I tell them that!"
Posted by Tony at 22:16
Tuesday, 21 October 2014
Chester, here pictured at 5.30pm was in his stable, or had been, I let him out to have a stretch and feed at a fresh bale, the others, save for Misty were on Oak Bank or the runway. At least that's where I thought they all were. 10pm saw Chester looking in through the living room window and begging an apple. With hindsight this was his way of grassing on his herd who were in the process of legging it as he crunched a windfall.
Answer, in the process of over the hill and far away, in the dark, windswept hill. As they were not hungry they were in a playful mood and so began the lets run away from the headtorch that swears game. Finally they were persuaded to return to the yard and a bright orange bucket of allure coaxed them over the threshold and behind the gate.
The open gate was not as a result of another visit from the PGOOR, more a product of my own stupidity as I had not shut it properly when very helpfully fetching firewood earlier.
Monday, 20 October 2014
My look of horror obviously fuelled his beaming smile when he delivered the coup de grace, "Well, you have limited options so I'm sure you'll catch on quick"
He led me past all the shiny super cars to a not so super car which looked like the type children collect found in chocolate eggs and was if similar stature. Driving lesson was all of "Don't try turning the key without the brake pedal pressed down" and "If you like we could amputate your left leg"
I tried to block out the funny man's comments and instead focused on the job in hand, launching Jazz into moving traffic. Sensing my disquiet Steve crouched down by the drivers door and with as much sincerity as he could muster said "Yes...I've often thought how tough it is on the driver of a car they they have never encountered before leave our forecourt and face that" He stared into the middle distance (Like Kilgore from Apocalypse Now) while the five lanes of traffic converging onto the 5 and half exits of Steels roundabout managed 157 near misses a second. He patted me reassuringly on the shoulder, "Good luck" and left me too it. Never ever having driven an automatic car this was going to be an eventful trip.
Posted by Tony at 23:23
Sunday, 19 October 2014
Posted by Tony at 21:50
Friday, 17 October 2014
Havoc was caused in the cottage tonight by the unexpected arrival of a large amphibian sat on my trainer. Froggy hitched a ride as I walked back inside from the Zombie infested darkness, thankfully the torrential rain kept them away, and when we (me and frog, not zombie) got indoors felt that a quick bounce around the room with a detour under the sofa was the order of the day. Comments raised varied from arrrr to high pitched screams when froggy jumped at householders. Finally the rampaging beast was cornered, caught and released back to the zombies.
Posted by Tony at 23:18
Wednesday, 15 October 2014
Lets ignore the simple ones like missing keys suddenly appearing centre stage of an empty table after the house has been turned upside down looking for them (pre mobile toddler so doubting Thomas read on) a passport not where it should have been, but then was some days later, or the bizarre situation where we went without coffee for two days as we had none and then the coffee caddy was full, instead focus on the latest.
The TV remote, often missing, often found, gone for days at a time, found in toy boxes, down sofas and once in a suitcase on holiday as the apprentice thought we would need it on holiday. TV remote had been missing for weeks, so long in fact that I was on the point of buying a replacement. Again.
New copy of Outdoor Fitness magazine arrives and as ever yours truly reads the best bits and sticks magazine anywhere handy. In this case on back of sofa. 24 hours pass. Sudden recollection of article in magazine, must read it, where is magazine. Everyone has gone to bed, I stand alone in living room trying to remember what I did with magazine, my beautiful and oh so patient wife who follows me clearing my detritus out of the way had not placed in corner in pile of current magazines. Deep thought recalls placing it on sofa, so it must have fallen down the back, quick shove to one side reveals new magazine front cover side up between wall and sofa. There placed on top was the TV remote. Aha you cry, toddler placed it there, no, no toddler present, and anyway toddlers love pressing remote buttons so its presence is identified as rapidly as the changing channels or increasing volume. Then it must have been on the back of the sofa and the magazine dislodged it and in some anomaly of physics landed on top of magazine. That explanation has some credibility save for the fact the sofa had been moved the day before to accommodate window fitters and their chaos. So lacking possible explanations we have to seek impossible ones (cheers Holmes) and that's Heidi.
And anyway who's reality is this anyway, mine.
Posted by Tony at 21:33
Tuesday, 14 October 2014
Monday, 13 October 2014
Posted by Tony at 22:42
Sunday, 12 October 2014
Posted by Tony at 21:41