Wednesday, 27 April 2011

Caught napping

It was a combination of things, joking with a neighbour about foxes, any trouble with foxes the innocent enquiry, trouble!! I listed their crimes against poultry adding the obligatory oh you never have your gun when you see them type banter, the its about time the vixens came out with their cubs the knowledgeable reply. Maybe the fact that the dogs are confined to barracks tonight as we have a VIP guest Berner, Elsa, to visit Rocky the love machine, so no distractions please! Or my working late so not turning on the anti aircraft lights and being 30 or so minutes later than usual doing my final perimeter security check shutting the poultry away.
Whatever it was we were like William in the above pic, caught napping. Signs that all was Pete Tong began with two runner ducks passing me, still running, the poultry house door was shut, not good if you want the birds to go to bed. The realisation that all the birds are missing and you are knee deep in feathers and the evil red glow of the predators eyes caught in the torchlight. Fast as a fat bloke can run in unlaced boots the armoury was unlocked, with Mr Beretta locked and loaded we go back out. The red pin pricks of light a little further away but oozing confidence that come what may it is going to survive this encounter, unlike the bird it was dragging away. I got within killing range but hands full of ten trillion candle power torch and shotgun would have meant a clumsy shot, and with my capacity for self harm that is not a good scenario. So rather than alert the fox to the new firepower I restrained myself and ignored the pull the trigger to see what happens voices and left foxy to it. Foxy now associates torch light with loud unhealthy wheezing sounds so wont be worried and should it stray into the field of illumination when I am better prepared I am hoping the last thing to pass through its mind is several hundred high velocity metal pellets.

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