Saturday 9 February 2013

Can you fix it?

 Never having diffused a bomb I can only speculate what it actually feels like, but I did get an inkling into the test of nerves required today when I set about our central heating control panel with assorted weaponry. On showing the part time volunteer smallholders how the the arcane central heating worked I confidently flicked the switch with a cheery "This one turns it on" when it went bang. The enquiry "Does it always do that?" was, I felt, somewhat redundant, as my five metre leap backward was a sure indicator that the flash and BANG was at least unusual if not unique. So we left our volunteers to four days without heating as well as no telly.
 Today I was tasked to change the control panel melted to the wall, and as an electricians famous last words were nearly "Don't worry I can honestly say I have never had an electric shockOUCH!" while sticking a screwdriver into the dubious wiring that hides behind our walls it was with a certain degree of trepidation that I, being a non electrician type, stuck his newly acquired screwdriver into the heart of the defunct panel. The fact that it didn't go bang has more to do with luck than judgement but I did take the precaution of removing HQ from the national grid, wearing rubber gloves, rubber soled boots while standing on a rubber mat. NO chances here.
My beautiful and oh so patient wife did raise the pulse rate by asking why the cooker was still on as I gripped the live wire (it wasnt live when  gripped it) but resisted the temptation the shout  BANG as I removed red wire 1 to connect with red wire 2. Instead she kept the torch steady so I could see what I was doing, have I mentioned that this was being done in the dark? Just to make it even more fun?
 The reason for the lateness of the task was this lovely girl got taken to a new home today, MBAOSPW's brother has decided to try life with a dog, and having just got a new house thought why not fill it with a donkey sized mutt. As can be seen from the pictures first introductions went well, she liked her sofa, helped little t open the biscuit tin and then laid claim to the rug. Well we don't have them at HQ so this must seem like luxury.
Several tense minutes of wire disconnecting and reconnecting, followed by an hour or so of trying to solve the press to set time/day/date time on off hot water or central heating only conundrum passed without injury and need to call the fire brigade. 


1 comment:

Jeremy Fisher said...

Well you do like living dangerously don't you?!
Glad to see that you survived your hols without too much mishap and just make sure that you revel in the reduction of hungry mouths to feed and avoid slipping back into the mire of multitudinous menageries.
I will be in Bristol at a meeting next Friday when you call but S will be here to feed you carbohydrate free cookies [don't ask]! Cheers