Uninvited guests part one

This daft bird arrived three days ago and has been making itself comfortable in the tack room, stuffing itself on bird feed and washing it down with spring water. We thought today we should encourage it to find its way home so the cats were cornered and shut away and Percy (he has to have a name) was placed on the helipad ready for takeoff. The expected launch failed to take place and once it stopped walking around the garden it finally managed a few wing beats and landed on top of the cliff, a favoured perch of Ryeland lambs.

We chose to ignore it, hoping Percy would take the hint and make like a tree, but when we did this evenings rounds the bird brain was sat on top of the stable with Nemo the worlds laziest cat who possesses all the hunting ability of a slug closing in on an unexpected meal. Me running across the yard windmilling my arms and yelling "Lookoutbehindyou!" caused Nemo to change direction and Percy to take off. Several ever expanding high speed circuits of the smallholding lifted our hopes that he had finally go the message but were dashed after a high speed fly by ended with an emergency turn into the stable where he is now perched on the rafters. He is safe for the time being but I rate his chances of survival about the same as the justice secretary's.