Tuesday, 14 August 2012

Gone in 60 seconds

 Regular readers may remember the vandalism of Hazel the almost 4x4 by Apollo the wonder horse, he, for whatever reason in his pea like deciding that the best thing ever as a bottom scratcher was the smooth panels of the poor Honda. So for a while now we have been driving around in a car that looks like it should be condemned and that has foxes living in it (the interior is my fault although I think mice moving in is taking the Michael) So used are we to the wrecked motor that we often forget and wonder what it is that people are staring at (sometimes pointing, rude!) when we pull up.
 And so it was today, there I was on a visit that was already interesting due to being asked to hold a 7 foot Boa Constrictor called Lucy while her not at all Goth owner cleaned Lucy's boudoir. Apparently this was a tame snake that liked men (no reason why other than men are perhaps broader, therefore more to get a grip of) and was well fed. So while I was eye to forked tongue I was asked about the state of Hazel parked across the road. I explained about the soppy horse with the itchy bottom. Visit over I was just getting in the car when a very nice man came out of his garage brandishing a fluorescent sink plunger. "Hang on chap, I have always wondered if this would work" and before I could say watch the paintwork he spat on the plunger and banged it into the largest dent, swiftly pulling it out to as good as new. For the next 60 seconds he went around the car and pulled out all but three of the smallest creased dents, one of which was caused by a shitland kicking in temper. We were both impressed with the results, for once Hazel looked almost like any other busy 4x4 from these here parts rather than one driven around a Kabul scrapyard.
Meanwhile Apollo watches and waits.

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