Some of our sheep are missing!

Geisha, one of two survivors of the Rock HQ goat cull, is getting much better, her leg now has enough strength to help her run up and down the lane, jump fences and stand on her back legs to reach things she shouldn't. Today as she walked along the lane she collapsed, her legs just folded under her and she lay in a crumpled heap. Nothing to worry about though it was the effect of a particularly warm sunbeam on some soft bedding that proved just too irresistible and she just had to make use of it.

Some of our sheep were missing so I assumed they must have set off around the hill. Half of the usual suspects were in the yard chomping contentedly on the new bale of haylege but seven, including Crispen, were nowhere to be seen. Until Tracey tried to get into the tack room that is. She found the door unbolted (Geisha got the blame) and the door unmovable as there was something pressed against it. Much shoving later the cause was discovered. Seven sheep were crammed into space eight foot by eight, the space further reduced by a half ton feed bag, three dustbins of feed, a couple of bales stashed for emergency, tools, saddles and other horsey things. Sitting on, under, across or in various items were the sheep waiting patiently to be let out. It was like one of those puzzles, you cant move one piece until another slides across out of the way. Finally Tracey managed to resolve the conundrum and normal service was resumed. Luckily the sheep are cute little woolly backs and Tracey has a soft spot for them otherwise they might have taken a step closer to the big freeze.

Job Done

 

Reba is not the only one we are wondering about as to whether there are little ones due or not. Misty looks plump but doesn't appear particularly pregnant, but as her foal will only be the size of a large rabbit she might just be carrying the extra weight well.

 

The chicken run was completed today, finally its off the to do list. The chickens will be rounded up tonight when they roost and moved to their new abode. The chances of catching them all without them scattering to the four points of the compass are remote but we shall give it our best shot.

Today Is Saturday Watch And Smile

It is such fun living here, really, no matter what happens to the outside world there is always something going on here to raise a smile, and today was a real tiswas day. The two clips of video show a couple of major things that happened. We played lumberjacks bringing down a spindly Ash tree that would eventually pose a bit of a hazard to the smalls, Trevor and Misty, one tree down, two to go. We gave the wood away as a belated Christmas gift to some friends. In return they gave us some marmalade, chutney and some eggs. To find out what happened to the eggs click on the Dolyhir link in the margin, a warning, its not for the squeamish. The tree was chopped up in double quick time, I refused to dress like I was in an audition for The Village People, Steve (another one ) was seemingly quite comfortable dressed this way and once he stopped frightening the ponies all was well.

We had two bales of Haylege delivered, it cost 50% more but at least they got here without any effort on our part, were placed exactly where we wanted them so posed no threat to man or beast and still they were 50% cheaper than feeding the hoofed beasts hay. Speaking of which the grass must be coming through as our Ryelands have started to venture out of the yard which on the the one hand is a good thing as it reduces the trip hazards and mess in the yard, on the other they might get the travel bug again and disappear.

On top of these jobs we got the trailer repaired, Trixie's jockey wheel collapsed after the pig run so a nice new shiny wheel and jack had to be fitted. As Trixie was over the at the Hall of the Stable Sprite we got to see him and his family who were sat quietly discussing the laws of quantum whilst cooperatively making a 5000 piece jigsaw puzzle of The Haywain, we felt bad disturbing their tranquil morning with our idle chatter but they didn't seem to mind.

Nessa and Stacey were less entertaining than the Sprite's clan and can only just be seen in the ark. The only reason you can see them is that they have kicked the back out of the ark, Stable Sprite said he didn't mind having to fix it, it would give him something to do as he was sick of puzzles.

In all a very busy day what with the usual routine, moving the felled tree, putting up the last wire panel on the new chicken run, turning two cockerels into coq au vin ingredients, making appreciative noises while someone else spent an hour of his valuable time sharpening my chainsaw, sawing a pile of wood in the lane, a training session for the BBMT and picking up all the rubbish from the black bin bag the Ryelands had savaged in search of sheep treats. A real tiswas.

Blue sky thinking

With this as your back yard how could you not think happy thoughts on an early morning wander round the bonsai mountain.

Its sprung

Since Monday we have had almost unbroken sunshine, spring has well and truly sprung and hopefully will stay that way for a while yet as we work our way though the jobs list. The chicken run is hours from being finished and as it has been in the construction phase since late October 2009 it really will be a job well done. The chicken house roof has been slated, posh birds these, and once the nesting box is put on the side it will be fit for purpose. The final spot of bother is the gate, as we used "natural" posts rather than machined there is no straight edge to hang it from, so a solution might be to make a bent gate and given my carpentry skills this is a likely scenario anyway.
I have a plan to convert the back of the kennel block to a stable for the minis, the Shitlands are tearing around Willow Rise and it really needs a rest from their antics. If all goes well this will be a simple task, and as long as Rene can straighten the broken five bar gate or get it approximately the same as the other one we have then we will have two ready made sides for an enclosure on the end. I like these sorts of projects as they are quick but most of all they are cheap as all the materials are here and being recycled.

The price of progress

Life's good here at Rock HQ. Another day where we made substantial progress and dealt with some of the minor irritations life throws our way, like the second freezer. This sits quietly doing its job, providing a resting place for bits of animals that wont fit in Mr Whirlpool, in the utility next to the washing machine. Unbeknown to us the door had not closed properly and over time the little freezer started to produce ice. Lots of it. When I opened the door today instead of finding packs of pork chops and other delicious morsels I was confronted with a solid block of ice. No hyperbole, the entire 30 inch cube of freezer space is is one big ice cube. Its currently in the wet room slowly defrosting. The risk now is that the cats get to the goodies before we do.

The pigs have settled in over at Stable Sprites kingdom, there has been a bit of bickering between our two new ones, now called Stacey and Nessa, they have to stay there for the next 20 days at least and hopefully Berky will have done his stuff. Plans to build a maternity suite are in place for any piglets resulting from their liaison. If all goes to plan the first thing that people see when they arrive at Rock HQ will be a nice fenced area around a Victorian brick pig sty instead of the eyesore tin shack held together with paint, nails and string that is supposed to be a chicken shed. The new chicken run is almost complete, six foot high wire mesh panels that are attached to one foot deep treated wooden boards which should keep Mr Fox on the outside and Mrs Hen safe on the inside. All that remains then is to build a similar enclosure for the ducks. If only there were more hours in the day, more days in the week and more money trees around!

Goat free zone....nearly

It was almost like Christmas, but the calendar was wrong, the excitement of this mornings arrival kept me awake because today, the second day of spring, Rock HQ became a goat free zone....well nearly. We probably have more goats here than most residences in the UK, but we have substantially fewer than yesterday. The council tried to thwart our plans by digging up the road, and as you can see they brought in some big boys toys to do a proper job. But we were so eager to be rid of the horned menace that we set out extra early.

Being the simple creatures they are it was an easy task to lure them to their fate, Trixie was baited with tasty treats and the goats were told to leave them well alone. True to form as soon as they thought I wasn't looking they piled inside, I managed to capture the look of surprise on their little faces as the door slammed shut behind them. Bless. Tracey then announced I had to trim their hooves which entailed squeezing through the jockey door and wrestling the brutes for their compulsory pedicure. They managed to inflict a few more bruises as a parting shot but ultimately victory was mine.

The goat rehab centre is in a secret location in the heart of mid Wales. Surrounded by trees, razor wire and machine guns the goats are free to roam, within certain boundaries where they can engage in all their antisocial behaviour without bothering anyone, much. Once they are ready there are trained therapists on hand who use cognitive behavioural techniques to help them explore the causes of their more extreme behaviours, to come to terms with the past and to help them learn new coping strategies that will enable them to reach their full potential and contribute in a meaningful way to society without becoming a Balti.

Juliet and Bravo spotted the greenery and bolted from the trailer without a goodbye glance. Maggie who we have had since she was a puppy immediately jumped the fence and ran after us asking to be forgiven, mewing pitifully, she would stay clean this time she promised. However there are some things that cannot be forgiven, and being a goat called Maggie is one of them. She consoled herself with mouthfuls of brambles hand fed to her by her keyworker.

The pigs who were destined to return to the kingdom of the Stable Sprite (bed and board , cheap rates for week days, book in advance to avoid disappointment) to be ravished by Berky proved to be an exercise in patience. Never having been in a trailer before they were not too keen to start. Generous bribes of food failed to achieve the desired result and one of them thought the best way of remaining a trailer virgin was to eat it. Once it decided the matting on the trailer ramp was not very appetising it succumbed to the sin of gluttony and climbed into Trixie and eat her fill. This then complicated matters, one pig in, the other out and showing absolutely no interest on joining its sister. Being the size of a Rhinoceros and about as strong there was no way of moving her other than by gentle persuasion. Trying the put her snout in the bucket of food and walk her slowly to the trailer ramp worked until the pig inside got curious as to the contents of the bucket and tried to get out. This meant the ramp had to be lifted, it went up and down more times than a Labour Leaders popularity rating. Eventually the impossible happened, the sisters were reunited and we were heading back to Rock HQ.

Unloading them proved just as difficult, they decided they liked the trailer so much that they refused to come out. However, a secret weapon was unleashed and they exited the safety of the trailer as they espied a tall dark handsome stranger approach, Berky had spotted his new concubines and was intent on winning them over.




Our adventure over we tried to get back to the sanctuary of Rock HQ. Now Rene had done spectacularly, he is a very capable vehicle and can cope with most off road conditions. This one proved a tad difficult so he was abandoned in the lane and we trudged back over the fields. Back on the ranch we were greeted by Geisha and Ambrose who were keen to let us know that they were going to be well behaved and there was no need for rehab for them. Feeling slightly guilty I made a bit of a fuss of them both and then got on with the rounds. A sudden crash, a bit of yelp and goat ran past with a bucket of dog biscuits hanging from her neck. The rehab centre might just have some room left.

Of course its safe!

The first day of spring got off to a fantastic start, the sun shone, the birds sang, the windmill turned once and promises to provide more than enough to keep Rock HQ active. Even the worlds biggest digger being unloaded from the worlds biggest arctic in the only access we have to the outside world failed to put a dampener on the days proceedings. It almost did, the fact that the council have decided to replace the culvert bridge on the tarmac stretch of the lane and forgot to tell us would normally not be a problem, I mean who wants to leave here anyway, but as I had already left and was trying to get back the million tonnes of heavy metal barring Rene's way was a tad worrying. The nice digger driver and his friend Mr Arctic cleared the way for Rene and so we were safely home. I did point out that the digger was wider than the lane but that posed no problem when it just crushed the hedge flat.
Their arrival has thrown a small fly in tomorrows ointment as it now means we have to get up at silly o'clock and take the goats to the rehab centre. Never mind, I would crawl over broken glass to make sure they get there, so an early start is no drama.
Slight drama this afternoon when work got underway on the new chicken run. The posts are ten feet high so me being a shortarse anyway could not lift the bodger up and down in the prescribed fashion to bodge the posts in. Problem solved when I moved the chicken house and used that as a platform to work from. The fact that it rocked like a Chilean landscape and meant I was four feet up overlooking a steep drop into the lane was no problem, much. I asked Tracey to hold the chicken house steady while I worked, she misheard and thought I said tip it over so I fall off. Had it not been for my cat like reflexes gravity would have overcome my considerable bulk and I would have landed somewhere in the lane. She managed to stop laughing in time for a quick conversation with a member of the local militia who stopped by on a routine patrol on his quad. He nodded his approval at my handiwork with the bodger. "Your being watched, did you know?" he asked
"Yes" I replied "I paranoid"
He thought for a moment, he was on a quad, I was on a big box, if I was dangerous he could get away. He nodded. "Back there, bold as you like" a stubby digit indicated the direction he wanted us to look.
"Got a brass neck that one, watchin your every move"
A large dog fox sat the other side of the track eyeing up the chicken dinners, finally under the weight of our combined stares it gave in and lopped off without a care in the world. "Problem you got is that see" he pointed to the gorse clad hill "Get up close without bein seen, but that, that's a cheeky bugger, an he'll be back."
"I know" I said as he drove off waving
You see, I'm not paranoid, I know they are out to get me.